Anybody looking at me and my husband from the outside would think we have a pretty prosperous life. We retired in our early forties, live on a beautiful spread, have a nice home, and can afford healthy food.
But material prosperity can’t buy peace of mind or joy. We’ve been lacking something much more important. Rather I’ve been lacking something much more important. I am slowly learning not to judge others’ hearts. And this blog is to share my spiritual journey, no one else’s.
I’ve been learning a lot since God forced me to sit down and relax in February. I’ve been pressing into His presence like never before, have hardly consumed any books or podcasts, except some classic Christian works, have watched only a fraction of YouTube videos that I used to watch – and none from any of the channels I’m subscribed to.
And so, God has finally had a chance to dig into my soul and reveal things about me.
One of the biggest revelations?
I have not walked humbly before my God.
I have not waited on Him to lead me, instead making my own plans and asking God to bless them.
A-hem: Mostly, He hasn’t.
I’ve been letting my mouth run off, criticizing and judging everyone and every situation who doesn’t fit my ideal, and snapping at both husband and son. I’ve allowed anger and resentment to fester toward certain situations. I’ve been committing a few minutes of my day to devotional time with the Lord, but mainly just to help with my anxiety (oh, and do I have something to say about that! In a future post).
I’m 51 years old, and just now finding out that for most of my adult life, I have calling myself a believer – and believing myself to be an especially devoted believer – yet I’ve harbored a rebellious attitude toward my Lord.
And I think I’m not off to say that most Christians these days are the same. It doesn’t take outright sin to walk in rebellion against God. All it takes is to not live in the moment.
Which most of us don’t do. We live in either the past or the future. I’m not going to get into all that in this post. Suffice to say that the vast majority of us are harboring negative emotions, and they come either from past experiences or worry over the future. Usually a combination of both.
Most believers certainly don’t spend more than a few minutes a day sitting quietly before the Lord, if that. Many Christians don’t even have a prayer life, and those who do, mostly spend it yapping away asking for this, that, and the other, instead of just sitting quietly and letting God work inside their soul.
It’s that quiet work that reveals His will, the next step He wants you to take. It’s that quiet work that reveals where you’ve stepped out of His purpose, and what you need to do to step back into it.
During the past few weeks, I’ve realized that whenever I’ve complained, planned, gotten angry, gotten anxious, judged, criticized, and gotten involved with a huge project that felt like a hundred root canals each day that it took to complete (most of my novels, and many of our homesteading projects), I have not been submitting myself to God’s will. I have not been humble. I have not been seeing the Almighty for the Almighty that He is, in all His holiness. In fact, I think it’s safe to say that I’ve lost sight of His holiness and my consequent lowliness.
If I walk in humility, I walk in perfect trust in God, and perfect submission to His will. Which means that I allow Him to lead me each moment of the day, instead of inventing goals to achieve and plans to complete. Instead of riling myself up thinking about an upcoming conversation I’m determined to have with J in which I will take him down a peg or two. Instead of following a path that some self-made guru has declared is the way to success.
When I walk humbly with God, moment by moment, I keep my mind set on Him. I don’t make excuses for my failures. I don’t get mad at Him because He’s God, and He could have prevented XYZ from happening. I don’t complain. About anything or anybody. I don’t judge. I don’t fear.
I don’t do any of that when I walk in humility, because I’ve stepped down off my false throne, where I think I not only know better than God, but believe myself to be superior to my fellow fallen humans.
Instead, I am continually grateful for the good He pours out in my life, and I trust Him to walk with me – even carry me – when troubles come along. I trust His Word where it says He works all things together for good for those that love Him.
And no matter what’s going on, whether enjoyable or difficult, I live each moment with Him, listening, paying attention, and acting only as I feel Him so lead.
That’s the key to spiritual prosperity. Humility. Because it’s the only attitude to have that will enable you to shed the shackles of the world, the snare of pride, and begin to see and walk in the life God has for you.
And in that humility, you realize that the only place to live is in the present moment.
It’s the only way to experience 24-7 peace and joy. No matter what.