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The Eight Ways To Get More Exercise When You Garden

Hey, Everybody, today I want to talk about the top eight ways to get more exercise when you garden. A low-maintenance garden, one that you can just putter around in, pulling a weed here and there and flicking off the occasional pest, has its advantages. But it has one huge disadvantage, and that is, it doesn’t allow you to maximize either your strength-training or cardio workout.

And we wouldn’t want that to happen. So without further ado, here are the top eight ways to get more exercise when you garden.

Number eight:

If you’re growing to grow vines on a vertical-type trellis be sure to plant the vine right at the end of the trellis. Remember, vines don’t just grow in one direction. They grow in all direction. So if you plant a vine in a middle of a trellis, it will be able to spread out in both directions without needing to be pruned.

But more work equals more exercise, right? So be sure to plant your vines at the very end of a vertical trellis so that you will be forced to out and cut off branches that are going in the wrong direction every few weeks.

Another vine crop many people like to grow is grapes. And speaking of grapes,

number seven is to plant things that really, really don’t do well in your area.

For example, if you live in a humid subtropical climate like we do, you probably get lots of rain in the spring, surrounded by very humid days. This constant high humidity is a breeding ground for fungi, including the block rot which most grape varieties are not resistant to.

Therefore, you want to go ahead and grow grapes. Why? Because every couple of weeks during the spring, you will have to go out an spray the entire vine with a fungicide. This doesn’t provide a huge amount of exercise, but every little bit helps.

Grapes are only one example. Do some research and figure out which garden crops have trouble with the climate or soil in your particular area, and be sure to grow them.

Number six:

demonize container gardening. For example, say you live in an area with acidic soil, and you want to grow goji berries. Goji berry bushes hate acid soil, so what do you do?

To maximize your exercise, amend the soil two to three feet down in an area two to three feet in diameter, and plant the gojis there. You will get even more exercise should the bushes shrivel up and die because you will throw a big, huge adult-sized tantrum.

Don’t ever use containers instead. Container gardening is for lazy people, who don’t want to spend hours digging and collecting organic material. Also, when you grow things in containers the fertilizer and water you put in go exactly where they need to go, preventing you from doing the extra work of extra watering and fertilizing because most of it flows away from the roots.

And don’t forget: never use plastic containers. Plastic is EVIL. And save you even more work, because they hold in water better than either clay pots or fabric pots.

The fifth top way to get more exercise from your garden:

Let your crops that like to get out of control, get completely out of control.

For example, red malabar spinach goes CRAZY once it gets hot. If you let a lot of those vines grow, they will turn into a mini-jungle that will provide you with hours of pruning and carrying away of foliage once the growing season ends. That will really help you toward those 10,000 steps you’re supposed to take every day.

Number four:

prepare your garden beds using the double-dig method. Lasagna gardening, the Ruth Stout method, and the Back to Eden method are all techniques in which you pile up organic material onto the existing soil and allow it to turn into even richer soil. This is the lazy way to build a garden bed. Sure, there is some exercise involved, but not nearly as much exercise as is provided by the double-digging method. This method of bed preparation is also guaranteed to stress your back, and we all know how healthy it is to stress back muscles, right?

The third top way to get more exercise when you garden

is to not mulch your soil. Whether you use leaves, wood chips, or straw, mulch helps preserve the moisture in the soil while it inhibits weed growth. This means, if you put mulch down in your garden, that you won’t have to water as much or weed as much.

This means, you won’t get as much exercise. So be sure not to use mulch.

Number two:

don’t fence in your garden. Thus, critters of all kinds will come and eat up your crops. This will add to your exercise routine in several ways. First, you will spend a lot more time sowing seeds and planting transplants. Second, you will end up jumping up and down and stomping in frustration. Great cardio. Finally, if you have a gun, you will likely, at some point, end up running after the hungry critters and trying to turn them into stewpot material.

And finally, the number one way to get more exercise when you garden:

water by hand. Even if you have a big garden. You don’t want to set up an automatic irrigation system in your garden. When you drag buckets, or even just gallon jugs, of water from the rain barrel or hose, you get both extra strength training and extra aerobic exercise. You can kick it up a notch by walking as fast as you can, even running, if possible, between the water source and your garden plants.

You get an extra bonus in the summer, when it’s so hot and humid that you start dripping with sweat after only a few minutes into your watering chore. Sweating helps clear toxins from your body, you know.

Well, there you go. The top eight way to get more exercise when you garden. Exercise equals greater health, right? And we all want to be healthy.

Thanks for watching, and remember: if you believe everything you hear or read on the Internet, it’s not my fault.

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